I just witnessed a conversation between two co-workers about how disgusting their fiancees are because they went out and spent hundreds of dollars on generators. And I viciously quote:

"I don't have a rug for the entry way, but we have a 5000 watt generator that we won't even need!"

Okay, listen. I'll gladly trade you the rug in my front entryway for a generator any day of the week. If Dan made a random purchase and it was a generator, I'd hug him. Because I actually spent three days with no power. I don't care if it sat in the basement for fourteen years, I know how much it sucks to wait a few days for the power to come back on.

Let me tell you how cold the house gets in less than 72 hours. THE TOOTHPASTE WAS FROZEN IN THE TUBE.

I caught the discussion while I was putting away a fire extinguisher I stole borrowed from the station so that, if for some reason my attempt at caveman living went awry, I could at least put the blaze out before it destroyed the house. See, I was so cold, I set a small fire in the living room to keep warm. IT WAS THAT COLD.