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WW)))))))OOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

I wasn't drunk when I lefts the bar, but I'm drunk now, muthafuckas! HOOOORAY!!!!!!

my eye itches like eyeshadow

Okay, I bork\

whoops

i'm abandoning all captiols. capitols take too long

i want to get fit.

wow. i should porlly stop drinking now. hmm. i could stop[ drinking and go do bed, or i could stop drinking and go to bed. wait...

i have to pee

My friend Josh got his film put on iFilm! Even though technically I had nothing to do with the actual making of the film, I did design the poster for it, and made all the accompanying promotional graphics. When it showed at the Austin Film Festival, a lot of people said they came just because of how cool the movie poster was. And he ended up taking home first prize!! So I'm very excited for him and proud that I could help.

Here is the link to the film on iFilm. If you watch and then tell a friend, I think good things happen. Josh is working in L.A. now (actually working! as a director! no longer house sitting!,) and if you view the film and then tell someone else to check it out, his company gets exposure, and he's a good guy (from Austin!) so he deserves all the love and attention you can send his way (via web traffic.)

If you're going to be loud, you should conjunctively be entertaining, don't you think?

I notice some strange and unusual things on my walk to Curves every morning.

Today, I ran in to PETA protestors.

Ahhh, PETA protestors. You will never cease to make me giggle. If I hadn't been on my way to work off my huge fat ass, I probably would have stood right in front of you and ate a cheeseburger.

Another tax day come and gone, and once again I would not have known it otherwise except for the fact that my choice of occupation insists on thrusting the topic in my face like so much cleavage at a titty bar.

Today I got a "Curves Buck," which I guess can be used towards "cool swag." But since Curves is mostly a middle-aged women kind of establishment, the "cool swag" is like grandma sweatshirts with big shiny butterfly appliques and puffy pens on fuschia backgrounds.

I bought an MP3 player. The last thing I bought that was this expensive was my truck. I can't remember the last time I've shelled out over $150 for something that wasn't rent or airfare. It's so expensive, I've been treating it like a pet or a small child.

Me: Hello. What are you doing?
Him: Oh, nothing, just--
Me: How is the Rio?
Him Uh, what? It's... fine...
Me: Is it charged?
Him: Yes. And I've already docked it.
Me: Is it working?
Him: Yes, quite well, actually.
Me: Has it said anything yet?
Him: Uh...
Me: Has it started walking on its own?
Him: No.
Me: Can it sleep with us tonight?
Him: Uh, no... listen... I gotta go. Dave is here.
Me: Don't let Dave play with it! He's not responsible!
Him: Don't worry, I will take good care of it.
Me: Okay. Don't let it stay up too late.
Him: Uh... yeah... Okay.
Me: ...tell it... ...tell it I love it.
Him: Okay, I gotta go.

We should probably name it before I get post-partum depression.

I like "sparky."